The Cold-Hearted Grand Duke Obsesses Over Me After My Death - Chapter 149

Chapter 149. In Search of Her (3)

A grown man would have to climb for quite a while to reach the end of the stairs, and at the end was a small door. When he opened it and went inside, a room appeared that was slightly larger than the prison on Peric Island, yet just as cramped. The room contained a small bed and a tiny space that could barely be called a bathroom.

‘How did a child live in a place like this?’

Louid looked around the inside of the tower with a disbelieving expression. He couldn’t tell whether the child had been alone or with someone, but it was an environment even an adult would struggle to endure. It must have been terribly cold and lonely.

“…!”

So that’s why she said she was cold.

“It’s cold….”

Only now did he feel he understood why Emilia had mumbled in her sleep every dawn that she was cold.

He looked at the small fireplace where Emilia must have lit firewood herself. Only a bit of ash remained there.

Emilia had been here. He had thought Emilia had grown up comfortably in the ducal estate. No matter how cruel Duke Berthe was, he was still someone who would take care of his own blood, so he believed she must have lived at least as well as ordinary noble ladies. But….

“Ha….”

Standing before the wall, he let out a sigh and looked out the small window. The ground below was impossibly far away. Fifteen years ago, Emilia would have been about five, so she must have stood on a chair to look outside. The boy who had stood there must have been her hope and her savior.

‘I didn’t even know, and yet I….’

How long must that child have waited for that boy to return?

“I was wrong. Emilia.”

He knelt on the cold floor and apologized to Emilia. Fifteen years ago and now, he was a sinner who had given her nothing but despair instead of being her light.

Even so, she had embraced him warmly without hating him, and he had driven her into the worst situation. It was all his fault that she had run away.

Silently weeping, he sat on the small bed where the young girl must have laid her body. The old bed creaked.

I’m sorry. I made you, who grew up alone, even lonelier.

‘Emilia, I can smell your scent.’

The scent of wildflowers lingered on the bed. It was a scent that had disappeared from her bedroom in the Crown Prince’s palace. Laying his exhausted body down on the bed, he slowly blinked, then drifted off to sleep. It was a deep sleep he hadn’t had in a long time.

He opened his eyes the next morning. It was already long past midday.

“Your Majesty! Please wake up, Your Majesty!”

The voices of two men rang loudly.

“Didn’t I tell you not to look for me?” Louid said as he sat up, running a hand through his hair. His hair, which seemed to have grown quite long, was disheveled.

“You didn’t come down all night.”

Jamie and Deo were assigned to guard him. They had followed him secretly while hiding themselves and waited all night, but when the Emperor didn’t come down, it seemed they couldn’t ignore it any longer.

“Go back to the palace. If not, I’ll cut you down.”

Louid gave the order with an annoyed expression.

“Yes, understood.”

At the Emperor’s command, the two knights had no choice but to leave. Left alone, Louid thought about how he could find Emilia.

He could issue a warrant across the entire empire for the Empress, but he did not do so. If he did, Emilia, startled, might hide herself even more carefully. And if she ended up fleeing to another country, he might never find her again.

‘That won’t do.’

He got up, went down the stairs, and rode south again. This time, he was completely alone.

***

A few days later, late in the evening. In a shabby tavern in a village on the border between the former territory of Duke Berthe and Count Dalton’s territory, a man was drinking.

He wore fine clothes, but they were covered in dust and stains as if they hadn’t been washed for a long time. His long black hair reached his shoulders, and he had a scruffy beard. He looked very tired, yet his red eyes still shone like jewels.

“They say the Emperor’s gone mad?”

“They say he seated a doll as the Empress at the coronation.”

“Really? He used to be so brilliant when he was a prince. How did he end up like that?”

“They say the Empress died because of the Emperor.”

The men drinking began to speak ill of the Emperor.

“Shh. That’s dangerous talk. Be careful.”

“Who’s going to hear us in a backwater village like this?”

“Heh.”

Emilia, it’s true that I killed you.

At the men’s slander, Louid nodded and smiled, then downed the strong liquor in one go.

Sometimes he slept out in the open, sometimes he stayed at small inns as he headed toward the southern part of the empire. Before leaving the palace, he had ordered Alex to send knights to every place Emilia might have gone and search thoroughly. He thought he would find her quickly, but things did not go as he expected.

“What’s with you? Why do you keep smiling like that? It’s creepy.”

One of the men picked a fight with him as he smiled emptily.

“Handsome face, but no fear, huh?”

“Hah, haha.”

Even as the men threatened him, Louid only kept laughing.

“Oh? Look at this guy. Let’s teach him a lesson.”

“Should we? I’ve been itching to use my fists lately.”

They were thugs who roamed the nearby villages, extorting money from customers.

Thud—

A large fist struck Louid square in the face.

“Haha.”

Louid’s body collapsed to the floor without resistance. Even so, his laughter did not stop.

“Huh? What’s this?”

Another thug hauled him up and threw another punch. Blood flowed from Louid’s lips as he fell again. But he showed no reaction.

“Hey, what are you doing? Take it outside if you’re going to fight.”

After the innkeeper’s sharp voice rang out, Louid was dragged outside. Rain was falling steadily. The punches and kicks grew harsher.

Louid could have subdued the thugs at once, but he let himself be beaten.

He wanted to be beaten to death. He thought he deserved to be beaten to death because he was a terrible person.

“Tough bastard. Tch.”

No matter how much they hit him, he showed no reaction, so the thugs cursed at him, breathing heavily. Then they kicked him as he lay collapsed in the mud and rifled through his pockets before running away.

But not long after, they ran into two knights at the end of an alley.

“W-Who are you?”

Soon after, the men, beaten to the point of unconsciousness but not dead, were thrown into a shabby shed by the roadside.

Jamie and Deo placed the pouch of gold coins the thugs had stolen back inside Louid’s clothes.

‘What should we do?’

‘Let’s just go.’

‘It’s raining. We’re just going to leave him like that?’

‘We don’t have a choice. If not, we’ll lose our heads.’

Exchanging words through glances and gestures, the two paid for the drinks at the tavern and then kept their distance, watching over the unconscious Louid.

“Sir. Wake up.”

A few hours later, the rain began to fall even more heavily, but Louid, collapsed on the ground, did not move. Just as Jamie and Deo were about to move toward the Emperor, a white-haired old man appeared at the entrance of the alley and woke Louid. He supported him and took him to a nearby inn.

***

Has your soul truly left me?

If, like in the bard’s song, Emilia left for the frozen sea and did not come to land but went into the sea instead?

At the ominous thought, his closed eyes twitched.

‘You should have come to land. Emilia.’

Even in his dreams, thinking of Emilia, he opened his eyes. A severe headache rushed in. But it had become chronic, so it was nothing. Realizing he was in an unfamiliar place, he abruptly sat up.

“My name is Simon. And you are?”

An old man was looking down at him with a worried expression. Perhaps his eyesight was poor, as he reached out and felt Louid’s face. With his scruffy beard, he didn’t seem to recognize him as the Emperor.

“There’s no need for you to know,” Louid replied curtly.

“You seem like a noble. What brings you to a rural village like this?” Simon asked as he handed him a cup of water. His movements were natural, as if serving others was ingrained in him.

“I’m looking for my wife.”

“I see. You should have treated her well while you still had her.”

The old man wore a regretful expression, as if he understood the situation.

“You said your name is Simon?”

Louid’s gaze turned toward the old man.

“Yes, that’s right.”

“Are you from the Dalton ducal territory?”

“No. I’m searching for the young master I used to serve.”

“The young master? His name?”

At that moment, Louid sensed that he was Simon, the butler of Duke Berthe’s estate. If he were searching for Emilia, he would say he was looking for the young lady, but he said young master, which was strange.

“I can’t tell you the family name, but his name is Damian. Have you seen him?”

If he mentioned he was the grandson of the late Duke Berthe, it might cause trouble for Damian, so he hid the surname.

“No. I’ve never heard that name before.”

Not only the name, he had never even heard that Duke Berthe had a grandson.

“I see.”

At his answer, Simon showed a disappointed expression.

“Why are you looking for him?”

“By my former master’s order, the young master was confined in a tower for a long time where I used to work.”

Simon began to tell the old story.