I Need the True Ending to Graduate - Chapter 74

“Won’t you hit me, Boss?”

“….”

“You don’t have to hold back. After doing it a few times, your hand will get used to it quickly. Violence is something you get better at the more you swing it. Or do you want to try hitting my cheek first, just as a test? To help you feel better.”

I reached out and grabbed Evan Bell’s wrist, moving it.

So that his hand would touch my cheek.

The moment his large hand touched my cheek as if to cup it, Evan Bell suddenly came to his senses and recoiled as if burned, hiding his hand behind his back. He was so startled that even that brief contact made him gasp roughly for breath.

“Hah, hah….”

The blue eyes staring at me shook with fear.

He had merely placed his hand lightly against my cheek against his will, yet he acted as if he had struck my cheek.

“I, I….”

Only after a long while did Evan Bell open his mouth. Even as his mind was tangled with all kinds of confusion, fear, and terror, he was desperately trying to continue speaking.

“I never wanted something like that.”

After saying that, he seemed to suddenly realize the contradiction in his own words and corrected himself.

“It’s true that I wanted to torment you. That part is right. But still… I didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want to use violence either.”

“….”

“I never once wanted to slap your cheek… or leave bruises on your body like that…. All I wanted was for you to regret it….”

Evan Bell’s head dropped heavily downward. Then he slowly steadied his breathing.

Amid dizzying confusion where he couldn’t tell what was what, he desperately inhaled and exhaled, as if trying to recover a single order.

I left Evan Bell like that, watching him with an indifference that was almost cold, as if whatever confusion he was going through was none of my concern.

As Evan Bell panted for breath, some thought seemed to suddenly strike him, and he abruptly lifted his head and began to plead with me.

“Stay away from that advisor of yours, whatever he is, starting right now. How can you keep staying close to him while being treated like that? I don’t know who Karl Evenhart is, but just quit everything. I’ll take care of what comes after.”

“….”

“If other people find out about you going around like this, your reputation will plummet to the ground in an instant. Everyone will tear you apart. Not only tear you apart, they’ll see you as something easy. That’s not right. That’s….”

Evan Bell shook his head as if merely imagining what would happen to me was horrifying. It was as if he were proving his words that, although he wanted me to be unhappy, he had never wished for that degree of misfortune.

But my mouth was already no different from a runaway locomotive.

“How am I supposed to do that? Look how far I’ve come. Graduation is right in front of me now. Besides, you prefer it when I’m unhappy anyway, Boss.”

“Lucia….”

“And everyone at the academy already knows that I’m sleeping with a professor. More precisely, they think I did.”

“….”

“But whether I slept with someone or not, if everyone thinks I slept with someone anyway, don’t you think it’s better to actually sleep with them? At least it feels less unfair.”

When my bombshell declaration fell, Evan Bell froze in place.

At first, he at least showed signs of shock, but now he had no reaction at all, like someone who had lost their soul.

He just sat there without moving an inch, blinking his eyes. It was to the point where I wondered if he was even breathing properly.

If this conversation were judged as a match, it was a perfect victory for me.

Because I had made the great Evan Bell shut his mouth.

‘But I didn’t want to strip a person bare like this to this extent.’

Just briefly getting past the situation would’ve been enough. I had no intention whatsoever of driving someone into a psychological corner by putting things I hadn’t even done into words.

But my body had already slipped out of my control, and I had no way to stop it.

‘When on earth is my body coming back to me? At this point, I’m scared of what I might say next. I don’t think I can keep watching any longer.’

It felt ominous starting from when my research was extorted by Karl Evenhart, and as things went on, it was becoming less and less like a romance simulation game and more like a bleak, miserable story.

With the situation heading in the exact opposite direction of the bright, cheerful game title, my head felt like it was about to burst, just like Evan Bell’s. I clutched it and desperately searched for the invisible switch that had to be somewhere in my body.

And finally, the switch turned off.

“Ah….”

At last, ‘my voice’ came out of ‘my mouth.’ My vocal cords moved the way I intended, and I could speak the sentences I was thinking.

But the water had already been completely spilled.

‘Ah… how am I supposed to scoop this spilled water back up?’

Even if I wanted to clean up the situation, telling him the truth, that I hadn’t said those things and that my mouth had just moved on its own, wouldn’t be convincing at all.

And it wasn’t appropriate to brush it off as something I’d just said without thinking, or as lies that slipped out unconsciously because I was psychologically cornered by his intense questioning.

Among the things I’d said when the switch was on, there were certainly lies mixed in, but not everything had been a lie. The rumors surrounding Lucia were no different from what I’d told him.

This part was a lie, that part was the truth.

Explaining it bit by bit like that would be pointless.

But even now, it was hard to pour out the entire truth to Evan Bell.

It was true that the bruises on my body were made with my advisor, but it was something we did by mutual agreement because of the nasty rumors circulating about me and the professor, and even though I did get hit on the ass, that was only because that was my sexual preference….

Just imagining myself making such a messy confession in front of Evan Bell, who was sunk in shock and despair, made my vision spin.

In the end, there was only one thing I could do.

“Boss.”

Carefully, I addressed Evan Bell, who hadn’t moved an inch and was clinging to my shoulders.

“I’m sorry about what I said just now.”

“….”

“My words came out harsher than I intended. I crossed the line a lot. I’ll be more careful about what I say from now on.”

“….”

“And please forget everything I said today.”

“….”

“I’m sorry once again, Boss.”

I apologized politely once more, but it seemed my words didn’t reach Evan Bell at all. He didn’t move even an inch, simply curling his body and leaning against me, struggling to catch his breath.

The trembling breath brushing against my chest looked like it might break off at any moment, and his large body, tightly drawn in on itself, was shaking pitifully with anxiety and fear.

It was the first time I’d ever seen Evan Bell look this fragile, like he might shatter at any moment, and without realizing it, pity rose up in me. The fully grown adult man, far bigger than me, somehow looked like a small child.

I instinctively reached out to pat Evan Bell’s back, then stopped myself.

The image of Evan Bell recoiling like a seizure when his hand touched my cheek flashed through my mind.

‘If I touch him thoughtlessly under the guise of comforting him, I might scare him. Let’s wait until he calms down.’

Thinking that, I quietly let time pass.

However, even after dozens of minutes and then hours passed, Evan Bell showed no sign of calming down. He did not budge at all, like a cicada clinging to an old tree.

I called his name several times in between, but there was no response whatsoever. To the point that I even wondered if he might have died like that.

‘It feels like I should probably get up now….’

I couldn’t stay glued to Evan Bell’s side forever to comfort him, and there wasn’t really any way for me to comfort him either.

Even if I wanted to apologize, he at least had to pretend to listen, but ever since the conversation with the me that wasn’t me, he hadn’t said a single word.

It seemed better to give him more time to collect his emotions before speaking to him again.

I glanced at Evan Bell’s pitch-black crown, gauging his mood, then called out to him once more.

“Um… Boss.”

“….”

“I think it would be better for me to head out now.”

“….”

“Boss…?”

I conveyed, in a roundabout way, that I wanted to go home, but Evan Bell didn’t even seem to hear it.

It seemed better to change my approach.

After a brief moment of thought, I steadied my voice. I recalled the way I had addressed him when the switch was on.

“…Evan.”

“….”

It wasn’t exactly the same, but a similarly dry voice came out of my mouth.

This time too, there was no reply, but his shoulders, which had been still, twitched briefly.

That was proof that my method was working.

I continued, imitating Lucia, “Lift your head for a moment.”

At Lucia’s words, Evan Bell, who had been frozen like a block of wood, slowly lifted his deeply bowed head.

Blue eyes in which despair and confusion, fear and pain were all tangled together turned toward me.

The blazing hostility and hatred that had always lingered in the eyes looking at me had burned away, fading like ash.

Without realizing it, I placed my hand on his cheek, which had grown gaunt in that short time. Then I calmly opened my mouth.

“Please forget everything I said here today. I think I spoke carelessly without realizing it. There won’t be anything like this again.”

“….”

“Then I’ll be going now. Call me again after you’ve calmed down a bit. We can talk again then.”

As I said that, I withdrew my hand from him and slowly rose to my feet, gently pulling myself out of Evan Bell’s arms.

I thought Evan Bell might grab onto me, but surprisingly, he let me go without resistance. And the moment he confirmed that I had completely slipped out of his grasp, he collapsed in place like a doll with its strings cut.

Leaving Evan Bell sitting limply in front of the office desk, I fled the room as if running away.

I was worried about Evan Bell, but staying by his side didn’t seem like it would improve his condition, and it wasn’t as if I had any decisive way to untangle his heart.

‘He’s not a child. Once he settles his emotions and organizes his thoughts a bit, he’ll probably call me again.’

Besides, he was a successful businessman known throughout the empire. Someone with that level of business acumen wouldn’t collapse just because I’d said a few harsh words.

Most likely, after some time passed, he would quickly regain his footing with the cold rationality unique to a businessman and return to being the Evan Bell who was once filled with hostility toward me.

‘No matter how I think about it, it really feels like I gouged too deeply into someone’s heart.’

For now, there was no way to clean up words that had already been spoken.

‘Let’s think about it later. Later. Once some time passes, a solution will probably come to mind. I’ll deal with it then.’

I forcefully shook off the image of Evan Bell that lingered like an afterimage in my mind and hurried my steps as if being chased.