Deceived, Yet Drawn to You - Chapter 137

Blair quietly mulled over the words that had fallen from his lips. A means. Before, that dry word would have made her heart sink, but now she listened intently.

Because now she knew his purpose. Edmund wanted Blair. He wanted to protect her within the sturdy walls of his castle, to become its master and possess her exclusively for life. Though his methods were arrogant and self-righteous, she couldn’t deny the affection underlying them.

Blair, too, wanted to become part of the world Edmund had built. The warmth emanating from him had now become her most precious possession.

“Edmund, when we first met, you wanted to inherit the dukedom.”

All misunderstandings stemmed from that very point. Blair believed Edmund had chosen a marriage of convenience for his own honor and success.

She’d assumed his change of heart after the duke’s will was revealed—despite his earlier claim of not wanting an heir—was due to his succumbing to greed for power. She’d spent lonely nights thinking she was merely the most efficient tool to fulfill the will’s conditions.

When she heard from Isabelle about the witness ceremony, she couldn’t help but crumble. The warmth they shared that night wasn’t comfort but a performance for proof, and the humiliation of feeling her sincerity had been mocked made her heart ache.

That’s why when she first heard about the pregnancy, fear came before joy. Even while receiving overflowing affection at the villa, she repeatedly doubted Edmund’s intentions, and she felt pathetic and foolish for it.

But if there was a reason behind it, she needed to know. Even if the truth waiting at the end wasn’t beautiful, Blair was prepared to bear it together with him.

“What was the reason?”

She wanted to know what Edmund’s purpose was back then, what made him want the House of Libert. In the past, she thought not asking carelessly was consideration and respect, but now she believes that talking rather than closing her ears will bind them more firmly together.

The man who lowered his gaze didn’t answer for a while. Only the distant noise of the people gathered in the hall to celebrate the exhibition reached them faintly. In the middle of that bustling space, a strange stillness settled as if only the two of them existed.

“At first, I had a different objective.”

A cold madness lingered in Edmund’s eyes.

“Once I achieved that, it wouldn’t have mattered to me how the history of Libert, which has lasted for hundreds of years, crumbled. It was nothing more than a shell I could throw away without regret.”

The man who let out a self-mocking breath closed his mouth for a moment as if swallowing the rest of his words. Blair steadied her breathing and looked up at him.

“But my thoughts change several times a day. I don’t want to regret what’s already passed, but whenever I remember that you were put in danger because of this name, I end up retracing my choice again and again.”

The fingers that had been toying with her knuckles slowly slipped away. Soon, they rose and gently cupped Blair’s cheek.

“If I hadn’t dragged you into this mire, I wonder if we could’ve been happy in a more ordinary way.”

Feeling the warmth that reached her so clearly, Blair felt slightly startled. He was always a man armed with cold logic. It was unfamiliar to see this vulnerable side of him, the man who used to move meticulously while staring straight ahead. The fact that a man who rarely showed weakness was wavering this much because of her pressed heavily on Blair’s heart.

“Don’t turn away from the lotus blooming through the muddy water.”

Blair clearly remembered the conversation they once shared in front of Augier’s painting that Edmund had brought in out of personal interest. The man who received back the very words he once said paused and lifted his eyes.

“It wasn’t you who dragged me in. I chose to stay. So don’t regret it. We’re happy even now, and your world isn’t a place that’s only murky.”

If the place where Edmund remained was a swamp, she would willingly make flowers bloom over it. Blair placed her hand over the back of his.

“And we’ve even borne such a lovely fruit.”

When she added that with a soft smile, Edmund let out a faint laugh as if scattering the wind.

“If it resembles me, it won’t be lovely.”

“Ed.”

Blair carefully placed her hand on his chest. The beating of his heart felt exactly like her own.

“My opinion that a child is the fruit of love hasn’t changed. I’m certain now. This fruit will set right the relationship that was precarious from the beginning and finally make us whole.”

The gray eyes that held her no longer wavered. As she met that steady gaze, Blair firmly believed her sincere feelings had finally reached him this time.

***

The exhibition held in Eldenvale concluded without a single flaw. The praise that poured in, as if proving the enduring strength of the House of Libert, tasted sweeter than ever before. It felt closer to relief than achievement.

Even as they left the museum and headed toward the ducal residence, he felt no anxiety. The space that had choked his breath his entire life was now merely a place to return to.

Streetlights beyond the carriage window illuminated Edmund’s face. The man who had been gazing at the ash-gray city averted his eyes and looked down diagonally beside him. Blair, who had been sleeping more lately, must have been exhausted from today’s schedule; she was asleep, her head resting on his chest.

The steady rise and fall of her breathing, the even breath brushing his ear, and the warmth transmitted through their touching chests were so precious that he unconsciously held his breath. Simply having such a small woman by his side made the grand mansion of Eldenvale feel no longer threatening.

Edmund had regarded the life in her womb as nothing more than a means and a restraint that would bind Blair to him forever, but she called it the fruit of love and breathed warmth into it. She even embraced his twisted sincerity. Before that love, Edmund felt a pleasant sense of defeat for the first time in his life.

‘…Love.’

Looking down at the face of the woman sleeping soundly, he tilted his head slightly. Edmund suddenly realized that he’d never confessed his love to her.

Even though such clear love soaked his heart, how had he still not confessed it until now? Through countless days when he cowardly chose silence, he loved her. What he truly feared was the dreadful emptiness within himself that would be exposed before her.

Edmund pressed a gentle kiss to Blair’s round forehead in place of the confession he still hadn’t spoken. He was now ready to willingly bear the weight of a confession that, once uttered, could never be taken back.

***

When they returned to the mansion, they headed straight to the marital bedroom. Unlike a typical noble couple, the two of them still shared a single bed. As they undressed, bathed, and changed into their nightclothes without being apart even for a moment, Edmund felt deeply satisfied.

In truth, sharing a bed was once a vulgar means he put forward for the sake of his objective. It was a performance and a strategy meant to create the impression that they were striving to conceive an heir. Looking back, it had been an excellent choice.

“When will I be able to feel the baby move?”

Blair burrowed into his arms as they lay side by side and asked. She’d dozed the entire way back to the ducal residence, so he assumed she would fall asleep the moment she lay down. But perhaps the conversation they shared at the exhibition still made her heart flutter, because even in the darkness, her pretty hazel eyes sparkled.

“I’ve heard that with a first child, the movement is felt a bit later. Why, are you curious?”

“I’m very curious. What if there was movement while I was sleeping and I missed it because I was half asleep?”

“That’s unlikely. I often watch over you while you sleep.”

“You don’t stay up the entire night watching me.”

In truth, there were nights when he did, but Edmund chose not to reveal his peculiar obsession. He merely let out a soft chuckle, buried his face in the curve of her neck, and savored the sweet scent of her skin. The fragrance that seeped deep into his lungs drew out a naturally contented breath. Perhaps it tickled, because Blair’s shoulders shifted slightly.

“Anyway, I hope you get to feel it too.”

“Of course I will.”

“Not just the first movement. It’ll grow stronger over time, so we have to keep watching together.”

“Just don’t push me away later, saying it’s bothersome.”

Edmund pulled the chattering woman closer and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. Soon she drifted into sleep, her breathing settling into a neat rhythm. Even then, he didn’t close his eyes for a long time. Afraid the warmth in his arms might vanish at any moment, he appointed himself the night’s watchman and kept his gaze on Blair’s sleeping face.

“Your Grace.”

At that moment, a cautious voice broke the peaceful silence from outside the door. It was the butler, Albert.

“I apologize for disturbing you at this hour, but you must come out now.”

Edmund pressed a kiss to Blair’s cheek, then rose from the bed without a sound so as not to wake her.