A Mad Lady’s Confession - Chapter 66

“You have no idea how delighted I am to meet you like this.”

Eleanor, who was lifting her teacup, looked at the blushing lady across from her.

Four women, including Eleanor, were seated at a table beneath a canopy in the garden, where a gentle breeze was blowing.

They were all noblewomen of Gammelstad whom Matthias had invited after considering their ages, ranks, reputations, and personalities.

“Everyone was curious, you see. About what kind of person the new duchess would be.”

“Actually, I caught a glimpse of you in town. On the day you handed out cookies.”

“Oh my, so did I. Though I only peeked at you through a window.”

The young noblewomen, who were three or four years older than Eleanor, laughed without malice.

“I made you curious for no reason. I should’ve introduced myself much sooner… I’m sorry to have kept you waiting.”

“Not at all, madam! We simply… wanted to meet the woman who would become the new mistress of Nielsen.”

Eleanor smiled awkwardly and drank her tea.

Let’s bury everything as it is.

She had made that decision a few days ago.

Even afterward, her heart wavered several times, repeatedly tearing down the resolution she’d struggled to make and rebuilding it again.

On the nights when her anguish came to her in nightmares, Matthias was the one who held on to her.

“Just think of what’s already passed as a dream.”

“….”

“It’s nothing more than a nightmare, just like now. Once you wake up, it all ends.”

It was only a bad dream. This was reality, and all she had to do was live in that reality with him.

He whispered those words while holding her tightly until she fell asleep again.

Those were the kinds of nights she spent. As sleep overtook her again and again, Eleanor was able to see clearly what she wanted.

She wanted to stay in Gammelstad, where he was. She wanted to remain by his side.

She wanted to be happy beside Matthias. She wanted to stay with him not only for the year they’d promised, but for far longer than that.

All she had to do was close her eyes just this once. Del would understand her too.

“Have you visited the coast of Solvikviche, madam?”

At the question, Eleanor raised her gaze to the curly-haired woman.

“No. The sea near Gammelstad Harbor is still the only one I’ve seen.”

“Oh my. You have the most magnificent sea right on your doorstep. What a shame.”

“Do I?”

“I heard there’s a beach if you follow the path leading down behind the Solvikviche estate. No one has ever been there because it’s the lord’s private property, but they say it’s incredibly beautiful.”

Eleanor thought Mrs. Melissa had said something like that when she first arrived at the estate.

“Then I’ll invite you there before the summer ends.”

“Oh, truly?”

Everyone’s faces brightened at Eleanor’s offer. One of the ladies spoke in a regretful tone.

“I’m returning to Mügelon, where my husband’s family lives, before this summer ends. If you don’t mind, could we perhaps see it today?”

“Ah, I already have something planned for today. I’m visiting an orphanage this afternoon to hand out cookies.”

“By orphanage, do you mean the one run by the convent? The one on the outskirts?”

“Yes, that’s what I heard.”

“Ah, I see. I’ve visited it before to provide relief as well.”

One of the ladies opened her mouth to talk about something she knew, only for her eyes to widen. Her startled gaze was directed past Eleanor’s shoulder.

“Duke Nielsen.”

The ladies all rose at once and curtsied toward someone behind Eleanor. Before Eleanor could even turn her head to look, Matthias approached with an arm around her shoulders and looked down at her.

The casually dressed man carried a gentle fragrance. His blond hair fluttered slightly, gleaming as it caught the light in the breeze. Eleanor stared blankly at him.

He smiled at Eleanor before addressing the ladies.

“I know it’s rude to intrude upon the ladies’ time, but might I join you for a cup of tea?”

“Oh my, of course!”

The ladies enthusiastically welcomed him.

A cup of black tea with a slice of lemon floating in it was placed before him after he took the seat beside Eleanor. Matthias glanced at Eleanor’s cup, then immediately opened the sugar bowl.

He dropped in one small sugar cube, then two, then three, one after another, and stirred vigorously. Then, as if it were nothing, he savored the tea with an elegant gesture.

“As expected, drinking sweet tea is excellent for recovering from fatigue. Wouldn’t you agree, madam?”

His eyes gleamed with mischief as he asked the teasing question.

Eleanor spoke firmly, like a strict noblewoman, “Do you not know, my lord, that three cubes of sugar are a luxury and an indulgence?”

The ladies gasped in horror, but the two of them continued their exchange without the slightest concern.

“I see. I wasn’t aware. But what does it matter? If Nielsen is destined to be ruined by three cubes of sugar, then so be it. Wouldn’t you agree, ladies?”

Gammelstad was not as hypocritical as the capital, Belgar, but everyone present was still a noble. At Matthias’s words as their lord, the ladies awkwardly expressed their agreement, nodding one after another.

“My wife has been feeling particularly tired lately, so I advised her to drink her tea with several cubes of sugar, but she says she’s worried she might set a poor example. You heard them, didn’t you, madam? Everyone says it’s perfectly fine, so from now on, drink your tea with plenty of sugar. I’ll work hard to increase my fortune so we can withstand the extravagance of three sugar cubes.”

There was no beating his sly way with words. Eleanor let out a soft laugh.

As though that truly had been his only reason for coming, Matthias rose from his seat only after finishing his cup of tea.

“I have an important matter to attend to this afternoon, so I’m afraid I must be going. Please enjoy yourselves at your leisure.”

After offering a courteous farewell, he planted a kiss on the back of Eleanor’s hand and left. Eleanor watched his figure stride away on long legs, his shoulders broad, as though dazzled by the sight.

“You truly are blessed….”

Everyone burst into laughter at someone’s dreamy, entranced remark.

It was a peaceful time. Everything was beautiful, as though she were dreaming a lovely dream.

When afternoon came, Eleanor boarded the carriage as planned.

The carriage, loaded with freshly baked cookies and cloth dolls for the children there, passed through the gates of Solvikviche and picked up speed.

After traveling along the outskirts for about an hour, a gray stone building appeared in the distance. When she opened the carriage window, the salty scent of the sea breeze drifted in, and a faded, steeply pitched gable roof came into view. Surrounded by high stone walls, the convent looked almost like a fortress, perhaps because of its atmosphere.

They reached the arched gate, and the carriage slowly reduced its speed as it entered. The abbess, who had come out in advance, greeted Eleanor respectfully.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, madam.”

“Hello, Reverend Mother.”

“Thank you for remembering the children and visiting them every year like this.”

With her completely white hair pinned up, the abbess looked more like a generous, good-natured countrywoman in her sixties than a woman of the cloth. The way she wore an apron with her sleeves rolled up made it clear that she was someone who took the lead in the work herself.

“Please come inside. The children are waiting.”

Eleanor followed the abbess. When she entered a small hall, the children who had been sitting quietly at the dining table all looked at her with sparkling eyes.

There were around fifteen children of various ages, and they all shyly accepted the cookies Eleanor handed out. Their cheeks even turned red when she gave them the handmade cloth dolls.

Following the abbess’s suggestion, Eleanor sat at the table and watched the children eagerly eating their cookies before quietly asking Mrs. Melissa, “By the way, are these all the children?”

There were far too few children compared to the number of cookies they had brought. Mrs. Melissa paused briefly before smiling.

“If we leave the rest behind, the children can eat them again later.”

I see. Eleanor nodded without giving it much thought.

The abbess showed Eleanor around the convent where the children lived. In one corner of the yard, where several small vegetable patches were gathered, there was also a barn housing chickens and a cow.

“I apologize for showing such filth to a noble lady.”

“No, please don’t say that. They’re all living creatures just the same.”

The abbess looked at her with slight surprise.

Eleanor asked cautiously, “Did I say something wrong?”

“No. Of course not.”

The abbess’s surprise faded, and she smiled benevolently.

“It’s simply that I’ve never met a noblewoman who would say such a thing before. Forgive my rudeness. …You’re right. They’re all living creatures, and all of them are precious.”

Eleanor nodded in agreement with the abbess before continuing, “Do the sisters tend to all the vegetable gardens and livestock themselves?”

“The children help with things like feeding them hay and grain and preparing the soil.”

“They’re good children.”

“They’re all children given to us by God.”

Just then, one of the nuns who had been helping in the kitchen hurried toward them.

“Reverend Mother, someone has come from Mr. Dugel’s family in the lower village. They’re the ones who borrowed the cow last time.”

“Really? Ah….”

“I’ll be fine, so please go. I’ll look around here a little longer and then return to where we were.”

The abbess hesitated, unsure of what to do, but eventually asked Eleanor’s understanding and hurried after the young nun.

Eleanor slowly looked around the now-quiet backyard. The crops in the vegetable patches, which the children had planted and tended, were growing remarkably well and already bore clusters of plump fruit.

A cow and several chickens wandered around inside the barn on the opposite side. Although it smelled of animal manure, Eleanor didn’t find it particularly unpleasant.

If anything, she found it fascinating. It was her first time seeing a cow from this close. The way the gentle-eyed cow blinked was incredibly adorable.

“…Hm?”

Just as she turned around, thinking it was time to head back, she caught sight of something resembling a small tuft of fur. When Eleanor narrowed her eyes and approached, it quickly hid behind a pillar.

She stopped walking. A moment later, it cautiously poked its head out again. A tiny child with long brown hair was watching her.

“Hello?”

“….”

The child looked about five years old. Both the child’s clothes and face were clean, but the child regarded Eleanor warily. Eleanor lowered herself and slowly approached.

When she finally stopped about three steps away, she noticed a narrow path beside the pillar in what she had thought was a wall. The child had probably followed that path to get here.

Eleanor took a bag of cookies from her handbag.

“I don’t think I saw you inside. Would you like to try a cookie?”

“….”

“It’s all right. Everyone else had some too.”

After hesitating and fidgeting, the child slowly shuffled forward while watching Eleanor’s reaction, then snatched the cookies from her hand. Seeing the child up close, Eleanor smiled at how much smaller the child was than she had thought.

“They’re very delicious chocolate cookies.”

Eleanor opened the package that the child’s tiny hands couldn’t tear and took out a cookie. The child eagerly accepted it and ate it. When Eleanor gently stroked the child’s hair, the child smiled bashfully.

“My name is Eleanor. What’s yours?”

“….”

“Why didn’t I see you inside?”

The abbess had said those were all the children inside. Perhaps this child had only come to visit.

With cookie crumbs around the mouth, the child tightly clutched the bag containing the rest.

“Why aren’t you eating them all? There are more. I baked a great many.”

Instead of answering, the child grabbed Eleanor’s hand and pulled.

“Me? Do you want me to follow you?”

Eleanor began walking, led by the small hand tugging insistently at hers. She slowly entered the path between the pillar and the wall as though being drawn into it.